Love, party and trips!!!

Hey guys!!!

Guess what! TOVE IS HOME!!! I'm so happy about that and we have hung out all day, or alomst anyway... but now she is taking a nap because she isn't used to all the noice and movement here after spending a few weeks at the hospital so she gets really tired. That's why I seized the opportunity to blog now when she is resting ;)

I suppose you can guess what I did when i wasn't hanging out with tove. Yeah that's right, I went for a walk with Nicky. It's quite strange because I thought after that "moment" the other day that the atmosphere would be wierd and tense between us but it isn't. It's more like we are getting closer and closer and arn't afraid of being near eath other. NOT in THAT way!!!! Just as friends!!! You know, holding hands, hugging and just talking without actual talking... But I can say like this, after the "alomst-kiss" the other day I havn't been able to get him out of my head! I'm even dreaming of him!!! I woke up this morning and got so fukking angry because I didn't get a chanse to finish my dream but then I noticed Nico sleeping next to me so that made it all better. :) But I don't get it, I don't think I have ever felt so deeply for anyone before. It's like beyond love... I like it but at the same time I don't, it just feels so wrong and it is wrong too... And Tove, don't get mad or whatever, you ask me to tell you how I feel so here you are.



Now I'm going to try and let Nico out of my head so I'll tell you alittle about some other stuff insted.

As you know it's my 25th birthday on monday, which is like exacly a week away. I can't wait!!! Okay, I'm getting older and I'm single - two things I hate. But the good thing with celebrating your birthday is that everyone is there for you and that you gets lots of presents :D i love presents!!! I just hope I'm getting something nice from Tove because I have huge expectations on her, I always do. That's kind of unfair isn't it? Hum... Eh who cares? hahah. But there are one thing I don't like about gifts and that is when everybody is expecting you to know what you want for your birthday and I have no imagination at all!! Everyone has asked, Tove, Nico, Shane, Mark and Kian, Lukas and Tobbe.... Everyone and I have nothing to tell them... i just go "I don't know"... hum... But does anyone really know what they want for thier birthday? But there is one thing I know we are going to do on saturday... We are going to the club where Albin works and we are going to PARTY all night!!! it's going to be great!!! I'm pretty excited about it although I'm not in the biggest party mood but having Tove home and Nico by my side I think I could go through anything at the moment!! :D

Speaking of Albin... I met him today to when I was going to pick up Tove at the hospital. He was walking towards to enrentrance form opposit me and when he saw me he held the door open for me. I couldn't help myself from fireing of
a big smile towards him and I could tell he picked it up and when we got inside he followed me to the stairs because he was going to see Henrik i guess. I don't get why he walked with me in the stairs when he could take the elevators... I have a phobia when it comes to elevators so i almost always take the stairs.. but anyway, he was flirting like a maniac when we were walking up to Toves floor and I can't say I wasn't flirting alittle aswell, but can you blame me? he is so fukking gorgeous!! Anyway, when we ot up to the right floor we met Henrik and I could tell he didn't really like it that Albin was flriting so much with me and the fact that i was responding to it. But he also started to flirt which was kind of fun because it was like they were competing over me :P hahaha I just loved it. :P


But I have to say that I think Henrik is way better in bed than Albin. Okay, I guess I haven't slept with albin but henrik was just amazing!! I mean the way he touched me and kissed me, they way he pulled me closer to his hot, sweaty body at the same time as he kissed my neck with his amazing lips. And as I looked into his incredible blue eyes I felt an amazing feeling and I just wanted it to stay there forever!!! And when I with tingeling fingers gently caressed his back and made my way towards his tight ass he gave out a moan and started to move faster. It was just so amazing!!! Oh My God!! If he ever flirts with me again I'm going to jump him right there and then so that i can feel his hot, fit body ontop of mine!!

Okay, from my wired thoughts to something more important... I suppose you all know that Toves talk with Linus didn't go so well yesterday and that he ran off with me after him... Well I can say that I cought him outside the hospital, tears were falling down his face but he didn't ive a damn. I just led him towards my car and drove him back to our house, i didn't think it was such a good idea to take him home to his because of his wierd mother. Anyway, when we got home we sat down on the sofa and he cried alot more... I feel soooo sorry for him and told him that over and over but I don't think it helps so much. When he didn't have any more tears to cry I tried to talk to him. He just said he couldn't talk to Tove right now and that he was sorry he acted like a 4 year old who didn't get what he wanted... But don't worry Tove, he will come around.. I hope. After a few hours i drove him back to his place and told him that he should try and think about something else or atleast try and understand that it would never happen between him and Tove. I didn't say it exacly like that because that would have been rude but I think he got the message and I think he will get over it.


As you know if you read Toves inlay she called Jensen yesterday which I'm happy for but I don't get it. I mean she really really misses him and Sean for that matter but she doesn't do anything about it! I don't understand, why the hell not? And especially since Jensen even told him he misses her!! I can say straight out that I miss Jared and Johnny sooooo much and I can tell that Tove misses her boys to, but she doesn't do anything about it. I talk to jared and johnny, I try to figure out what I want and to me love is the most improtant thing, and I love jared and johnyn so much! And Tove loves jensen and Sean too but to her love isn't the most important thing. I asked her what she thinks is more imortant but she didn't answer me, she just said "it's comlicated" but I mean how fucking complicated can it be? It's just love! So Tove, take your fukking pride out of your fukking head and shove it up your ass and call jensen and ask him to come back to sweden so that you can see eath other!!!

Sooooo.... Mallorca!!! YAY!! me and Tove have finelly decided we are going and we booked the tickets this morning. We are leaving on thursday next week. it's oing to be great!!! I'm going to miss everyone though, especially Nicky but I suppose it might me a good thing being parted from him for a few weeks. We are coming home on thursday the 30th of April so that is exacly 2 weeks. That aslo means we arn't going to be able to blog everyday but we are going to try and stop by to say hi and tell you guys how we are doing and alittle of what has happened. of course we will tell you all about it when we come back home so be ready for a few pretty long inlays next month ;)


Speaking of trips I can always inform you alittle about the Sligo trip. We have made the decision of going when i come back from mallorca. Although Mark, Kian and Shane are going to Sligo on Friday next week so it's just going to be me and Nicky who leaves from here in May. I just have to thank Nico for waiting for me bacuase I'm a sceard flyer so I don't know how I would have done it with out Nico. I just hope it will be an easy flight to both Dublin and mallorca for that matter....

Hum... I don't really know what else to tell you. Tove hasn't woken up yet and I don't think I should wake her because then she will be awake the entire night insted so I just think I'm oing to go to Shanes room and hang out with him and Nico for awhile.

Tove will blog tomorrow

Take care
Love
Madde