Boy, do I have some news for you guys! ;P
First off I have to tell you alittle about yesterday. Like Tove wrote in her inlay, she and Tobbe got it off yesterday. I can not believe what a horndog she has become! I mean, first she wants to have sex with her doctor and then she starts flirting with my little brother and now she was totally making out, close to having sex with Tobbe!!
Thank god me and Lukas walk in on them when we did and not a moment later cus who know what would have been going on in that room then... Dear God! I don't understand why she just can't take it easy and try to heal. She is not allowed to have sex yet because her wound hasn't healed completley yet and if she has sex before that it's going to take so much longer before she is fullely healed. I have to tell all the guys to stop visiting her or atleast stay 5 feet away from her bed and not to make eye-contact! I promis you Tove that i will do that if you don't do as i say! I'm getting so angry with you right now!!Anyway, as Tove aslo told you that I was going to have a few drinks with Pontus last night, which I did. let me tell you alittle about it...
He picked me up at half 8 and we drove back to his place. I had it all sorted out, if we were at his place we would be alone and noone would desturb us. He had bought a few bottles of wine and we sat in his livingroom talking and drinking with beautiful love music in the backgorund. It was so lovley and he looked so hot in that subdued light, his deep brown eyes looking at me with so much care and love and the atmosphere were just so unbelieveble. Suddenly he started to lean in towards me
and without a care in the world I kissed him. The funny thing is that if i kiss a guy and we are alone and well you know everything is in the right mood I always have sex with them. But this wasn't the case here. He gave me a few kisses filled with passion and then he looked at me with wonder in his eyes. I was just feeling so happy that I didn't even have sex on my mind and I just crawled up in his arms for a cuddle and we were just lying there, me in his stong arms, for awhile. We talked about the past and he told me he missed me so much and that he still had feelings for me. It was so nice to hear but I remebered that he was one of the many guys i have been dating that was nowhere to be found when i truly needed him.
After a few more glasses of wine i got up and draged him to the bedroom and I suppose you can imagen what happened. Yes we had sex and it was GREAT!!!!
When i woke up this morning i found a note on his pillow saying he had to work today but that he had a great night last night. I didn't care to stay around his place longer than I had too so I called lukas and asked if he could pick me up, but he couldn't... I didn't want to be there when pontus came back from work so I called the only person I know who would drop almost everthing for me. Nicky. I asked him to drive me to the hospital to see Tove and he did so without a question. God I wich pontus could be like Nico...
Nico couldn't stay with me while visiting Tove because he had to head home to take care of the kids while Zara was at the studio recording Carry loves new album. I walked into Toves room but noticed she allready had company. The therapist asked me to wait outside for another half and hour so that she could speak to Tove alone. I went to the café across the street from the hospital and bought a cup of coffee. Suddenly I heard my name being called out and looked around to see who said it and there was Dr. Hottie! I smiled and sat down opposit him and we talked for awhile. I noticed he has the most amazing blue eyes and he gets an adorable wrinkle between his eyes when he laughes. I just couldn't stop looking into his eyes and for a few seconds we were just sitting there looking into eath others eyes. Suddenly he put
his hand ontop of mine and stood up, I had to follow him as he pulled me up with him. My heart was pumping like crazy and I bet he could hear it as he took a step closer and I could feel the warmth of his body when he put his right hand on my neck and pulled me closer. I thought my heart was going to jump out of my chest when i felt him perfect lips touch mine and his hot breath filled my mouth. It felt like the kiss lasted an eternity but when we broke it off he looked deeply into my eyes and smiled. He just looked so gorgeous and I didn't want the kiss to end but then he said he had to get back to work and he gave me one last quick kiss before he left. I was just standing there like i was in seventh heaven or something! It was so fantastic! But I don't think I won the competition because Tove is still stuck at the hospital and the competition wasn't supposed to start until she got out... Hum, I wonder what she is goin to say about my little kiss with Dr. Sexy...
I was walking on clouds when i left the café and reached Toves room. As I opened the door I saw henrik standing next to Tove examining her. He looked up and gave me the biggest smile ever and I had to catch my breath, he is just so hot! I could tell that Tove saw the smile and my reaction but she didn't say anything about it and i desided not to tell her yet. I wanted to see what she was going to say when she read it here because I can be so much more specific when i'm writing, so... Tove what do you think about the kiss? and I'm sorry i didn't tell you but i wanted to see you reaction to it when you read it. ;)
Anyway I stayed at the hospital with Tove for a few hours and then i had to head home to eat some dinner. When i got home I found the house completly abandoned so I made my own dinner and sat down to eat. I was so bored and didn't have anything to do so I called Nico to ask if he felt like doing something. He said yes and came stright over, we grabed a glass of red wine and a bowl of popcorn and sat down to watch the horror movie Mirrors. I hate horror movies at the same time as I love them! I'm so wierd, I know. I just love to be scared at the same time as I hate it :S. Anyway, I crawled up next to Nico who put his arm protectively around my shoulders and I just didn't want the movie to end so when it did i made the decision not to move and he just continued to sit there holding me. I was so happy and felt so safe. I don't think I've ever felt so safe in my entire life and it was so nice.
But then i remembered I had to blog tonight too so I went to get the computer and then returned to the sofa. I think I'm going to wrap this up now and go back to watching movies with Nico and crawle back into his arms.
We will see if Tove will blog tomorrow because she has a few hectical days infront of her. She is going to do a bunch of tests and stuff and I think she is going to be to tired to write anything. But we'll see.
Take care!
Love
Madde
You know who you are. I love you!
take it easy! I couldent help myself with tobbe! sry! but I can meet a guy I prmos! Don't be so damn worried all the time!
ReplyDeleteI need sex, you of evreyine should understabd me!
ofcouse yo whwre going to have sex with him!
was he better tne before? ;) haha
what the fuck you are not telling me about the kiss?!
If you thikn I'm jealous, so then you are right because I'm but i'm not mad, just wait and see ;) haha and no you haven't won yet so sry baby ;) hehe
do you understand how much wine you drink ina week It's sick! you should start taking it easy!
yeah well you could have tried!
ReplyDeleteyeah i know you do but you are worse than me!! and that is really unhealthy!
haha no he was the same :P
I'm sorry :P I just wanted to see you reatction when you read it :P
haha I know you're not mad, but you are so totally jealous! ;P
I know, but that means I get to kiss him more times ;P
haha what :P It was only this weekend and me and nicky only drank one glass eath :P
well it's SOOO fucking hard!!!!
ReplyDeletewell just try to not have sex for like three month!! yeah I know it is! but I can't help it! and you should undersstand me more then anyone else!!
is that good or bad? :P haha
yeah you should of been hear! :P haha then you would of see it irl ;P haha why should I be mad it was just a kiss ;) haha yes I am, I wish i can tell you that I'm not but then I'm lying :P so I'm SOOO jealous ;) was he good kisser? ;) tell me in detil ;)
yes do it ;) haha so that means that O can kiss him too ;)
I just have a feeling that we are going to end up fightng about this guy :P haha It's just a felling but I know us :P haha
Madde it's not just this week you drink like this evrey week, I'm just worried! Just watch out so you not end up hear with liver cancer, because you can get it from drinking.
I knwo but you have to!!
ReplyDeleteI do understand you! but i still have to say "try!"
haha both i think :P
hahahah yeah i should have, but I had a great evening with nico so :] :)
I don't know, you can get mad about a little thing like a kiss... :P hahah and you would never lie to me right? ;P Yes he was such a good kisser!! Well just the why he got me up and the way he looked into my eyes, it was the best kiss I've ever gotten!! i so inlööööv!!! ;D
haha sure go for it girl ;P haha yeah i think so to, we will see where it goes and take it from there ;P
yeahyeah, I'll start to take it alittle bit slower... Or I'll try anyway :P hahaha
I can't!
ReplyDeletewell if you had understood me you woulden't say try!
haha okay :P so you had hope for something better? ;)
hahha yeah I know :P
that depends how it is! :P are you afride of me getting mad at you? ;P haha no ofcourse not I never lie you know that! :P I always tell the trust! oh I want him to!!
haha good ;) I'n pretty sure that it will not end up with flowes and kisses betwwen us :P hahah becuse it never dose when it's about a guy :P
good, because I don't want to visit you here next year or so :P
Okay, fine. I'm not in you position so I shouldn't ask anything from you but i don't want you to get hurt. I want you to be able to come home when you are ready and then stay there with me.
ReplyDeletehaha you could say that :P
yeah :D
haha yeah alittle :P
haha nooo never :P hahaah
Oh he is so fukking gorgeous!
haha no it doesn't :P
haha okay :P
thank you! well I will, and I want get hurt for havning sex I promis you that! an if I liy here week longer when I have allreday been here so long that's no problem for me.
ReplyDeletehaha you are so evil ;P maybe he thinks the same about you ;)
haha what are you afride of? :P haha
ofcourse never! :Pfor example when hav I lied? ;)
Oh he sure is!!!!
so why are we doing this all the tiem ? :P
yes so take it easy now!
okay fine I suppose I have to trust you on that. Okay you might be fine with staying at the hospital for one more week but you have no clue how hard it is for me too see you in that bed looking the way you do. I just want you to come home and i want everything to go back to normal. So we can go out partying or just have a nice calm night inside infront of the telly or just have one of our chats that we can spend hours and hours on. I don't want you to stay there for another week, I want you home now.
ReplyDeletehaha yeah maybe :P
I'm afraid of you throwing things at me :P
haha like i said, Never ;P
yeah!
haha I don't know, we are sick :P
I will :)
Yes you have to!
ReplyDeleteI look like a always do, or do I still look sick?
well we will have that soon I promis for the rest of our life I hope!
You have never told me that you think this is so hard... why not?
It's not like you do keep it inside you, so what's wrong baby?
just talk to me. And I know you want me home, but I'm not even sure when I'm going home.
maybe he's disappoited ;) haha can you handle that :P
when have I ever trow things at you?! tell me :P
good then we agreed ;) I never lie ;) haha
oh yeah!!
yes we are :P haha do we wnat to kill each other or what :P hahah
sorry..
ReplyDeleteYou look so pail and week in that bed, and I just hate it!
yeah i hope so..
because I thought I had to be strong for you. So that you could see that I'm okay and that you are going to be okay too. But it doesn't seem to help sence you wont listen to me. Can you just plz think of me for a second and how hard it is to see you like this. I'm afraid to go to bed at night, because I might wake up to a phonecall saying you are gone. I can't take that! So plz, for me, listen to me. :'(
yeah i can handle it :P
haha I don't know :P you threw things at jared and johnny :P
haha yeah ;P
yeah!
haha i don't know, our friendship is very unhealthy :P
I thougt I looked fine, I feel fine anyway.
ReplyDeleteMadde honey you don't have to be strong for me, because I just thought it was weird that you where so fine with everything, but I just thought maybe she is. and I'm oing to be okay and so are you.
I listen but I don't always do as you say. You almost make me cry now.
I will be here forever I promis, and you will never get that phonecall because I will be home soon and then you can sleep with me if you like. Maded you as to start sleeping again, you can stay here in my arms for a night if you like, I would love that. Then we can talk about how you really feeling. and if somehing happends to me baby, but just if, I know you can handle that, you are the strogest person I know.
and you should know that I'm worring about you evrey minute because when I'm here I can't see how you are really doing and wehn you vistit me you don't tell me anything because then evreything is fine. like I said you don't have to be strong for me, you can cry I wont die for that. you have to start talking to me again. we have to help each other trow this.
haha are you sure about that :P
well that was johnny and jared I would never trhow things at you. :P
but you do ;) haha
yeah it is, maybe we should look for soem help or something :P
yeah well nobody looks good in a hospital...
ReplyDeleteI have to be strong for you and I have to be strong for me but it's so fukking hard! ecspeially when you are working against me...
But I need you to do as I ask! I'm sorry but it's how I feel, I just thought you should know...
thank you but i still fear it. Now nico is with me till you get home but it's stil going to be hard to sleep. No I wont be okay, a part of me is going to die with you!
I'm sorry honey, I don't want you to worry about me, I'm fine, i have Nicky and he helps me so much. I can't... You need to see positivt people and not sad once...
yeah :P
thankx :)
yeah but just little white lies :P
haha yeah maybe... :P
true, but I don't lookat that sick either.
ReplyDeleteYou don't have to be strong for me, and it's okay to be sad about it, I am. I'm scred too do you know that, evrey day I'm scerd! so you dpn't have to be strong baout it, not for me and not for you. just let it go.
I know that you thinkI should to as you ask, but I have to make my own desitions sometimes.
it's good you have nico! you can always call me when ever you like.
you can't say that honey, you can't say that! You will be fine eventelly, you just have to for my sake!
well I just can't stop worring I have been worring about you my whole life so I can't just stop.
well you can cry when you are in the same room as me, do you really think I can stay positive when I know how misserble you are all the time.. when you don't even can show me how you really feel, that's make me worried.. plz be you not someother shell how cames and vitit me,plz ?
did you really thinkI would do that? :)
littke? :P not sure :P haha
haha yes :P
No but I still worry about you...
ReplyDeleteare you? sceard I mean... I'm here for you honey!
I know you do but it's so hard when the desitions you make maight hurt you...
I don't know if I will... I'll try and I think everyone I know will try to help me but i don't think it will make it better...
Why ahve you been worrying about me for? I'm fine :P
I'm sorry that i'm worrying you, okay, I'll show you how I feel but if it's to much plz tell me.
I don't know :P
haha yeah well :P
yeah :P
yeah I totally understand that...
ReplyDeleteyeah ofcourse I'm. I'm not that tuff as I seems to be, so yeah I'm really sceard, because I'm to young to die now my life has just started, so ofcourse I'm scared I just don't want to show it..I know you are, buT I don't think you can do that much..
they want hurt me..
no maybe not, but you have to be fine what ever happends!
well you often got in truble! :P haha
yes I will, but it can never be to much for me baby.
I like that you are scared of me :P haha
you are a good liyer and I'm not ;P
good...
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry, i think you are to young to...
are you sure they wont hurt you?
we'll see.. or we wont because you are going to be fine!
hehe okay I suppose that's true. :P
are you sure?
oh great :P
I know ;P you wouldn't even get away from a speeding-ticket :P