Hands off

Heya!

So Tove is having a hard time keeping her hands off Jensen but I suppose that is not a big surpirse. I'm more suprised that she is capable of doing that because it's jensen. She is sooo strong it's crazy, if it would have been me and Jensen would have been Nicky I would NEVER be able to keep my hands or lips off him becuase i love him and he is so hot!!! :D But I suppose Tove is stronger then me as I always has said and I must say I'm kind of proud of her but I still think at some point it will get to much and things will happen, which means clothes will fly across the room and the bed sheets will be all twisted and turned around the two steamy bodies underneath :P hahah

Well today I woke up in my bed insted of that damn hospital bed, those beds are so hard and uncomfortable and I realyl hate them. But I woke up really early as usual these days and my arm was aching alot and I tried to get up but the whole room started to spin, I have no idea why but anyway I picked up my phone and rang Jared. After a few signales he picked up and was really sleepy and siad "yeah?" I said "Hey you, can you please come to my room and give me some morphine and help me out of bed? I can't sleep.". He sighed and said "Yeah alright." after like a minute he knocked on my door and walked in. I gave him a smile and he looked so tired and I said "Sorry that i woke you up but the other day you said that you could feel when i needed you but I think you lied to me.". He just looked at me and went to get me a glass of water and then he returned with the water and morphine. He sat down on the bed and I took it and drank it then he said "you want to go donwstairs?" I nodded but said "But you don't have to go with me, you can go back to sleep again if you want to.". He shook his head and said "nah, I'll come with you... I bet you'll call me aain otherwise." I looked at him shocked and said "What makes you think that?!". He just gave me a look that said "Really? you want to go there?" I just smiled and said "Sorry, can you help me up?". He walked around the bed and helped me up, notice that he wasn't wearing a shirt and only a pair of softy pants so when he helped me I almost tripped and I felt his strong arms and hadns catch me and hold me thighter and I felt his chest mucles under my hand. When we stood there I looked up in his eyes and he looked so hot, his lips was slightly parted and his hands were still around my back but one slowly moved further down and was soon on my bum. I bit my lip but then I threw my right arm around his neck and pulled his head down so I could kiss him. He picked me up and laid me back down on the bed and kissed me with such eager that it took my breath away. His hands were touching me everywhere and soon one of them found it's way inside my panties and I moaned alittle while he caressed me gently. I took a grip of his hair with my hand and pulled his lips from my neck to my lips again so I could feel that eager again. His lips were massageing mine and his tonuge was playing with mine. When he felt I was all wet and had satrted to moan more he put his fingers in me and moved them slowly, I moaned louder and he started to kiss my neck insted then he wispered in my ear "Can you do this?". I just looked at him and said "I could do this with my arm shopped off." he smiled and took his pants and boxers off and I saw that he was allready worked up and hard so I didn't have to help him with that. He took his fingers out and pressed his beast in me, I moaned loudly when he put it in me and everytime he moved I moaned more and more. I ran my hand over his goregous back and felt every muscle in it work under his skin. He moved faster and closed his eyes but I took a hold of neck and pulled him down and said "harder!" he looked me in the eyes and smiled and kept the eyecontact as he gave it to me harder and harder. I moaned even louder and he just smiled and then I felt how close I was and since it's not the first time we had sex he could tell i was close so he kept going hard but stept the speed up a notch and that was just what I needed to come. I screamed and he kept going hard and fast and I put my nails in his back and he just flext every muscle in his body and came inside of me. He pressed his body against mine but he still had his beast inside of me and I wrapped my arm around him and kissed his shoulder. He breathed heavily in my ear and I smiled and wispered "That was the best in a long while." he laught alittle so his abs pressed even harder down on my stomach and I bit my lip and he said "Better then make-up sex?". I smiled and bit his earlobe and said "Almost". He looked at me and smiled then he took his beast out and laid down next to me. I laid my head down on his chest and stroke it and kissed it and Jared said "I wonder how things are going for jensen and Tove, if I know jensen right he is giving tove a hard time.". I laught alittle and said "Oh yeah he is, she is having a really hard time and is really working hard not to do anything, like kiss him or just touch him.". He smiled and stroke my back with his fingers, I shivered and he asked "Are you cold?" I tilted my head up so I could look at him and said "no, it's you... you and your hands always send shills down my spine.". He looked at me with eyes filled with love and he placed his hand behind my neck and kissed me, it was a soft gentle kiss filled with so much feelings that it was crazy... it was like a kiss Nicky would give me. When our lips let go of each other he looked me in the eyes and wispered "God I love you so much Madde Karlsson.". I bit my lip and laid back down on his chest and closed my eyes, I hate when he does that becuase I know how much i hurt him and when he says those words and mean them so badly I really hate myself. How can he love me so much when all I do is hurt him? Why can't I love him insted of Nicky? But God knows i love nicky and not jared, I just love him as a friend but sometimes I swear the feelings I once had for him just come rushing back to me and I just want to tell him that he is my everything but then Nicky comes along or just pops up in my head and then the feelings gets turned to him insted. Jared kissed my hair and put a finger under my chin and made me look at him again, a tear fell down my face and he stroke it away with his thumb and he said "I love you and I always will eventhough you don't share my feelings. I know you love Nicky and I know he makes you happy, all i want is for you to be happy even if it hurts me. I'm sorry that it's so hard for you to be with him and that things are working against you but I'm here for you if you need me and if you ever notice that the feelings you once had for me is coming back then I'll be waiting for you, forever.". Once again he pressed his soft lips against mine while tears fell faster and faster down my cheeks. I wrapped my casted arm around him and put my head next to his and hugged him and cried "You are to good for me Jared. I love you, I do... I just wish it was in a diferent way then it is.". He kissed my shoulder and tried to comfort me while I cried. When I didn't have anything more to cry he kissed me agian and got up from bed just to walk into the bathroom for a shower. He didn't care that he didn't have anything on so I stayed in bed and looked at that sexy man walk away. His abs, chest, legs, arms, hands, face, back, ass and of course his beast ;) Soooo sexy!! I stayed in bed untill he came out with a towel around his waist and his hair combed back and he was still wet on his chest and shoulders. I smiled and he walked over to the bed and and put and arm behing my back and kissed me. He helped me up from the bed and I kissed his chest and asked if he oculd help me put a plastic bag over my cast which he happily did and then I took a shower as well.

When I came out again I had wrapped myself in a towel and found the room empty, I got a bit disappointed becuase I wanted to see Jared there waiting for me but he wasn't. I started to get dressed and went downstairs and found a steaming cup of coffee on the table and a red rose next to it. I smiled and then Jared came over, gave me a kiss and lead me to the table and sat me doen infront of the cup. I shook my head while I smiled and said "What is this Jared?" he said "What? it's a cup of coffee to the most beautiful woman in the world and a rose that can't even match her beauty.". I said "well then I shouldn't sit here should i?" he walked over to me and pressed his lips against mine again and I ran my fingers through his wet hair then he said "Of course you should beautiful.". When he had truned his abck to me I bit my lip and smiled shyly, I had totally forgotten how romantic he can be. I have to say that i miss him... I took a sip of the coffee and it was perfect, just the way i like it, then he came over and joined me with his breakfast and we talked for a while but then my phone rang and I saw that it was Nicky. I bit my lip and was thinking if i should pick it up or not but then Jared said "If it's nicky, pick it up.. I'm okay with it. I'm going over to Jensen soon anyway.". I smiled at him and said "Thanks." and then I answered and nicky said "hey gorgeous, how are you? Arm okay?". I smiled and said "Hey babe, I'm pretty good today, and the arm is okay, just aching alittle sometimes.". He said "That's good. I was just wondering if you wanted to come over? or I can come to you.". I said "It's okay I can come to you. I'll be over in an hour or something, just gotta finish my coffee and talk alittle to Jared.". He said "okay sounds good. see you later baby. Love ya." I said "See ya, love ya." then we hung up. I asked Jared when he was going to Jensen and he siad "Dunno, maybe in an hour or so, not sure if they are awake yet, it's just 9 yet.". I nodded and he said "You can go to Nicky even though I haven't gone to jensen.". I said "I don't want to hurt you jared." but then he just said "It's okay honey. I love you but I ahve to deal with the fact that you love Nicky and I'm going to try and not be so jealous all the time.". I gave him a soft smile and said "Thank you Jared." he just smiled and then he saw that my cup was empty so he said "Go to Nicky now.". I got up and walked over to the sink to leave my cup and then I walked over to Jared and ran my fingers through his hair and stopped when it came to his neck and then I pressed my lips against his. When we stopped kissing he smiled and I stroke his cheek and said "See you later sexy." then I walked out through the front door and walked the 15 minutes to Nickys place.

When I got there he opened the door and gave me a hug and as soon as I felt his arms around me and breathed in his scent and saw his gorgeous face I just felt my knees weaken and my heart started to pound so hard. When he let go of me I just smiled and he lead me inside and we walked into the livingroom and sat down on the sofa. I asked where Shane and Kian was and he said "Upstairs, they are packing... going home tomorrow so you know that dinner we were talking about... it has to be tonight. So can you eat here tonight?". I smiled and said "Of course! I just have to go to Jensen and visit him before so I can't stay so long now and then I have to go home and change clothes because I can't look like this.. but what about I come over at 7 tonight?". Nicky smiled and said "okay that sounds good but you won't walk here and since you can't drive I will pick you up tonight at 7 or maybe I'll send Kian or Shane.", I smiled and said "Oo! drivers! I just wish I could drive myself... I feel so handicapped.". Nicky moved closer and put a hand on my thigh and said "I know honey, but right now I'm glad you can't drive. You have no idea how scared I got when you said you had been in a car crash." I said "But I want to drive and it wasn't my fault. I'm sorry I scared you but you should be glad that it was me who asnwered and not a nurse because that would have feaked you out even more.". He said "I know but still, I'm glad you can't drive now for a while because I don't want to get that scared again soon. God if you hadn't answered I would totally have freaked out and tought you were dead. I don't even want to think about it. Frist get scared for Zaras life and then ontop of that your life! Please promis me tht you will be careful.". I placed my hadn on his cheek and said "I know, I'm sorry I scared you. Don't worry I'm not going anywhere, I won't die. I promis I will be careful but I can't promis that I wil drive slower." He moved alittle and his hand moved from my thigh to my stomach and he said "Good because I don't know what I would do if you left me like that. Please just try and drive slower.". I felt his hand move alittle on my stomach and it sent shivers down my spine. I said " would never leave you Nicky, never. I can try but I don't think I can." he moved his hand further back and started to stroke my side and he siad "Good, becuase I won't leave you so. Well that is all I ask.". His face was so close to mine and I felt his breath on my face and I just stared at his AMAZING lips and I just wanted to throw myself around his neck and kiss them. Then, of course, he had to lick them the way he always does and it's so sexy and I felt how I started to lean in and I was so close at kissing him before I noticed what I was about to do when I got up and said "Gotta go to the bathroom." then I left him there on the sofa and went into the bathroom. I sat down on the toiletseat and put my head in my hands and sighed, one part of me couldn't believe I was so close at kissing him and one part of me couldn't believe I just walked away from kissing him. I just sat there thinking and tried to calm myself down but everything I saw infront of my eyes was his face and his eyes and his goregous sexy kissable lips. They are so distracting and everything you want to do with them is kiss then and feel them press against mine with eager and love and desperation. God I have to stop thinking like that. After a few mintues Nicky knocked on the door and said "Are you okay in there?" I took a deep breath and opened the door and smiled and said "Yeha, fine.". I stared at his lips and licked my own and then he said something but because I was so disracted I didn't hear but then he said "Madde? Are you sure you're okay?". He looked really worried and I said "Ehm, yeah I'm fine... it's just alittle hot in here." he walked closer to me and put his arm on my forehead to check if I was warm but then he siad "Well you don't have a fever anyway.". I walked pass him and back to the sofa and sat down, he soon joined me and I asked "Did you say something before you asked if I was okay?" he nodded and said "Yeha, I just asked when you were going to Jensens.". I shrugged and said "Dunno, soon I guess so I can hang with them or him for awhile.". He nodded and said "So you don't have time to watch a movie?" I shook my head and looked at the clock and said "Nah don't think so, but we can watch one tonight. I think I should go now becuase it's 14 o'clock and Jared is probobly wondering where I went.". He nodded and then he said "Sounds good. okay then... how is Jared doing then? still in love with you?" I sighed and said "Yeah he is... But somehow I think It's harder for me then him because I hate to hurt him and everytime I say your name or soemthing like that I kow I hurt him... I hate it.". He nodded and said "I know, I'm sorry baby." I stood up and said "Yeha me too. I should go now, it's a long way to walk.". He stood up next to me and said "I can drive you if you like?" I smiled and said "Thanks Nicky I would love to.". We walked into the hallway and put our shoes on and then Shane and Kian came downstairs so I gave them a Hello/Bye hug and then we left.

We took Nickys BMW and it felt really wierd not to sit in the driver seat and Nicky drove soooo slow it felt like it was going to take forever. I said a few times "Drive faster so we get there today." He looked at me and said "No, I'm driving legally today.", I sighed and said "No, drive faster...". He said "Stop it Madde! I won't drive faster and there is nothing you can do that will make me drive faster.". I looked at him and gave him my cheesiest smile and said "Really?" I put a hand on his thigh but then he said "Madde don't! Do you want us to drive off the road!?". I didn't move my hand I just started to laugh and said "You can't even drive if I touch you alittle?" he said "No of course not, I can't focus on the road if you are inside my pants then all I will think about is you and how badly I want you.". I just smiled and said "Well in that case maybe we should turn back and lock ourselfs in your room." he raised his eyesbrows and said "Really?". I looked him in the eyes and saw that he was serious so I said "We can't do that Nicky." then I was about to remove my hand but he just took a hold of my arm and forced it to stay there then he moved it back to the wheel but I didn't move my hand insted I kept it on his thigh. When we stopped infront of the hotel I asked him if he wanted to come up with me but he shook his head and said "Nah, I should go home to Shane and Kian since they are going home tomorrow." I nodded and we kissed each others cheeks and then I said "Thanks for the ride, I'll see you tonight.". He said "No problem, sounds good. I love you." I smiled and said "Love you too." then I closed the door and walked into the hotel.

When I had walked up all those stairs to the suite I was totally exhausted but knocked on the door and heard jensen yell come in so I walked in and found Jensen and Jared sitting on the sofa talking and laughing. I gave Jensen a hug and then Jared pulled me down on his knee and pressed his lips against mine. I was so glad to be able to kiss someone after all that with nicky and when we broke away from the kiss Jensen said "Wow, you guys seem really cozy.". I just smiled and gave jared another kiss adn then jared asked "So did you have a good time at nickys?" I nodded and said "Yeah, it was good. So where is Tove?". Jared smiled and looked at Jensen and then both of them started to laugh. I felt like a questionmark and I aksed "Why are you laughing?" Jared said "You'll see soon.". I just said "Ooookay?" jensen laught and said "Have some faith Madde, you'll see sooner or later." I just shrugged and said "okay." then we started to talk about everything else. All of the sudden we hear Tove scream "JENSEN ACKLES!" and both jared and jensen bursted out laughing. I asked them what they had done and Jensen said "We took her clothes." I laught and then the bathroom door opened and Tove stood there in just some really sexy underwear and looked really angry. Jensen and Jared just sat there smiling and then Toev said "My clothes!" but none of them said anything so I looked at them and they were like sitting there drooling looking at her. I hit Jareds arm adn said "Stop drooling!" then all of them turned to me and looked at me and Tove said "Jealous much?". I looked at her and said "I'm not jealous." she just said "Yeah right." I said "Who is the jealous one here?`yesterday with the room service?". She just said "I wasn't jealous!" I just looked at her and then I said "Are you talking to me all of the sudden?". She just said "Well this was the last time." then she went into the bedroom and took on some clothes. Then Jared siad to me "Were you jealous?" I just hit his arm and then he said "Well, she is sexy." then Jensen said "Hey man, keep your eyes to yourself!". I just said "Exacly!", Jared just smiled at me and stroke my thigh and kissed my cheek and then I turned to Jensen and said "Tove had a hard time keeping her hands off yesterday.". Then we heard her say "No I did not!" but then I said "Yes she did, expecially when she was going to shower you but the whole bathroom thing is a dificult period for her, just to be that near to you and to help you in and out of bed is hard too... Poor her.". Jensen just smiled and then I said "You are a sweetheart not to flex your muscles while she looks or touches you..." then I winked my eye to him and he just smiled a very evil smile. So I think you can expect some flexing muscles and some heavy breathing from Tove tomorrow ;) hahahhaha. When Tove came back out from the bedroom she didn't look so happy but none of us care. She joined us and then we talked about everything and nothing althought Tove didn't say so much but she looked at me and Jared in a weird way. He was holding his arm around me and we kissed a few times and Jared was really cozy and smoochy.

When the clock was almost 5 it was time for me and Jared to go home so we hugged Jensen and Jared hugged Tove and then we left. I was about to go to the driverseat but then Jared said "Sorry love, I'll drive." I sighed and went to the passanger seat and we drove off. He too drove so slow and got a bit irritated with me because I said he drove to slow. But after about 15 mintues we were home na dwent into the kitchen where everyone was allready seated. Jared sat down adn looked at me becuase I wasn't joining them, I said "I'm eating dinner at Nikcys tonight becuase Shane and Kian are going hom tomorrow... see you later.". Then I walked upstairs and changed clothes, I put on a gorgeous slim black dress and a pair of red pumps and some nice jewlry. I looked pretty darn sexy and then the clock was half 6 so I walked downstairs and went into the livingroom where everyone had moved to after dinner. When I walked in Jared looked at me and opened his mouth adn then I smiled and just looked at him, then Tim looked up and I could tell he thought I looked so hot but then after a few seconds he turned his gaze away becuase he is still angry with me. Even Johan checked me out but then it knocked on the door and My ran and opened it and I heard Shane say "Hey sweety, is Madde here?" I heard My say "Yes, she is. You look really good Shane.". He smiled and gave her a kiss on the cheek then I made my entrence. I walked slowly towards him and when he looked up his chin dropped and I just smiled at him and he said "Wow! You look super gorgeous!" I just smiled and said "Thank you, you look very good yourself." then he held out his arm and said "Shall we?" I nodded and said "We shall." then we left. I didn't noitce a car but then he walked into the garage and left me outside then he drove out with the Alfa Romeo and got out and opened the passanger door for me and helped me inside. I smiled and said "Are you sure this is okay?" he smiled and said "Nicky ahs allready talked to Krisen and she said it was okay that we borrowed the Alfa. Nicky didn't think you would want to go in his BMW.". I smiled and said "He is so right." then we drove off and 5 minutes later we were there. Shane opened the door for me and helped me out and lead me to the frontdoor and opened it for me. When he closed the door Kian walked into the hallway and when he saw me he got eyes big as UFOs and then he walked over to me and gave me a kiss on the cheek and said "You look incredible." I smiled and siad "You look really good too.". He wispered "nicky is in the kitchen." I smiled and walked over to the kitchen and looked in, Nicky was standing there cooking, he had an apron on because he didn't want to ruin his clothes. I took a few steps into the kitchen and then he noticed me and turned to me with a smile which chnaged in a heartbeat to a dropped chin. I smiled and he walked over to me and said "Oh my god, you look... I can't even begin to tell you how gorgeous you look.". I smiled and felt my cheeks redden and he smiled and stroke them and said "You are so beautiful when you blush because it's not often someone gets to see you blush.". He kissed my cheek and then Kian came in and said "I can take over the cooking, you go two go and join Shane in the diningroom.". Nicky thanked him and took off the apron and gave it to Kian and he looked soooooo good in the clothes he was wearing under the apron. I licked my lips and bit the lower one and then he turned to me and we walked into the dining room where Shane was setting the table with candles and everything. I smiled and said "Wow, what a romantic dinner this is going to be." Nicky laught and said "You think so, we were thinking alot of drinking and alot of laughter.". I smiled and said "That sounds soooo great!" Nicky lead me to a chair and pulled it out for me and pushed it in when I sat down. Then he left and when he came back he was holding a wineglass in his hand filled with redwine and gave it to me then he kissed my cheek adn wispered "You look really amazing.". I smiled and took a sip from the wine and then I said "And you are super hot, you have no idea." he smiled and then he walked back to the kitchen to help Kian out. After a few mintues they came back with the food and sat down and we started to eat. They had done amazingly and it tasted so good and I don't even know how manty wineglasses we all drank just to dinner but it was many! I always get really giggely form redwine and I was giggeling like crazy and the lads were having a really good time too. When we were done with dinner we moved out to the livingroom and Nicky got two bottles of wine in there so we didn't have to go all the way to the kitchen to get them. He sat down next to me and put a hand on my thigh and we talked about alot of stuff and had a really good time. All of us where really really drunk and we said alot of stuff that I'm not going to write here because it's kind of private. All of the sudden Nicky looked at me with really scared eyes but I just bursted out laughting becuase I was so drunk but then he said "Oh my god! You've been drinking and taken morphine!". I stopped laughing and stared at him but then I just started to giggle again and said "No I havn't, I frogot to take my morphine for tonight so it's okay. But I could use some becuase my arm hurts. Eh, who cares I got wine and you guys!". Then I threw myself around his next and hugged him while I was giggeling. He just started to alugh to but then his hand that where on my thigh started to move higher and under my dress but even thought I was drunk I took it away and placed it ontop of the dress insted and he kept it there. After a few more hours of laughter and booze it was time for me to go home but I could barly walk and Nicky said "You can stay here if you want to.". I said "Dunno if it's a good idea." he put his hadn on my cheek and tried to look in my eyes but he was so drunk but he said "You can hardly walk and I'm not going to let you walk 15 minutes home. you are staying.". I put up my finger to him and said "Don't you dare try anything in that case." he gave me a cheesy smile and said "I won't.". I said "You know what, I'll call Jared, he can come and pick me up." he tried to stop me and cinvince me to stay but I picked up my phone and called jared. He answered fairly quickly and I asked if he could pcik me up or walk here and take the alfa. he said "Sure, honey, how drunk areyou?" I started to alugh and then he said "okay, I'll walk there, be there in 15... see you soon.". Shane and Kian said good night and w2ent upstairs and I joined Nicky in the sofa and he was all over me and it was really hard to keep my hands away from his so they happened to find their way inside his shirt but we didn't kiss or get undressed or anything. 15 mintues later it knocked on the door and I walked over and opened it and threw myself around Jareds neck and said "Hey sexy!! Wow, you are so hard!". He just laught and then I let go of him and walked back to Nicky and kissed his cheek and hugged him and then I said "See you tomorrow." then I followed Jared outside, he had to help me to the car and help me inside and then we drove off. When we got home he helped me inside and up the stairs adn into my room. He helped me get undressed and laid me down on the bed. He laid down next to me and we both fell asleep. I woke up a few hours ago and fet so sick so I went to throw up adn then I started to blog. Jared is still sleeping and I think I'm going to go and join him now. God I feel the hangover kick in.... Night!

Tove will blog tomorrow.
Take care
Love
Madde